Deal with it.

fence

/fɛns/ [fens] Show IPA noun, verb,fenced, fenc·ing.

–noun

a barrier enclosing or bordering a field, yard, etc., usually made of posts and wire or wood, used to prevent entrance, to confine, or to mark a boundary.

That’s ‘ole man Webster’s definition of that which can divide our property, harness our horses, or make for bad neighbors.  Cyclone (yuk) or Split Rail, it usually has but one of two jobs… contain or keep out.  Unless one happens to be a politician.   It is then that we all can see the ancillary benefit of having put up a fence; and one certain politicos well take advantage of: To sit on.

The fence is usually a safe perch from which a legislator can gauge – or attempt to gauge –  how the voters may come down on a certain issue (or issues), and a position from which to play both sides against the middle.  And once he/she has corralled the trust and support of the populace he/she can then employ the fences of their North 40 to secure and maintain that patronage.

Unless someone leaves open the back door to the barn.

This rural metaphor – and lesson – has begun to come home to roost with The King these days as his well chronicled penchant for coming down on both sides of an issue has him exhibiting more personas than Sybil.  One almost wonders these days which Castle will exit from the Cadillac – The affable politico who stands for the applause and photo op while standing next to a Really Big Check (the 2.4 mil he was puffin his chest out over securing for a Newark tech company) or the cunning party apostle that actually had voted a fortnight prior to shelve the funding that made the Really Big check possible.  Huh?  Confused yet?  Well welcome to the world of today’s moderate (See wishy washy or ambiguously indirect … (yes, we know its redundant) – take your pick.

Seems the way of the moderate (progressive Republican) in a modern political landscape loaded with landmines (financial and otherwise),  is mapped by such intentions.  Navigational acuity is required if one is to keep all political limbs intact.  The King has had such skill sets but they are eroding… as is the latitude provided by reputation and years of service.  And in a down economy where even the most trifling subsidies, paltry scraps of pork, and relatively unsubstantial earmarks loom huge for a State in need, and at a time where an incumbent’s popularity holds as much predictability as last weekends weather, Mike has picked a whale of a time to 86 the 1% of Fed Spending that would find its way into the light pockets of say… The Ministry of Caring and Mary Campbell Center and their slew of needy constituents.  But, hey… “we gotta start cutting costs, say the GOP drones, and we’s gonna start now… and the King will vote with us… then tell you how that same 1% was his doing in years pastso it don’t sting so bad”

Heya, Mike; this was one of those times ya could’ve really looked like someone who withstood the call of the party siren and stood with the peeps who put him in office.  We know ya want to.

We like ya, Mike… lots of folks do… and we know you know that voters more often than not (that is when they’re not in the grips of manufactured fear) vote their pocketbooks.  And while yes, the Dems tend to spend first, ask questions later, they may have a point here… and they’re gonna sharpen it.

The blatant party tow-line act ain’t helpin’ ya.  We have quite a few serious financial, environmental, and constitutional issues comin’ right at ya that will require a solid two legged stance right on the American soil.  Maybe its time ya ponied up, closed the barn door, and hopped off that fence.  You’ll get a lot more support for taking a real stand then you’ve been told by those who built that fence.

The American Soldier.  A battling archetype born of the relentless spirit and fierce will for a fight that has preserved democracy and freedom ever since a fateful morning 19 April, 1775 on a Concord Bridge and a Lexington Green.  A legend of honor and bravery honed later in the trenches of the Western Front, the cliffs of Normandy, the sands of North Africa, the skies over the Coral Sea, the hills of Inchon, the bars of the Hanoi Hilton, and the insurgent insanity of Ramadi.

Whether sporting the badge of the All Americans (82^nd) , Screaming Eagles (101^st), The Big Red One (1^st Infantry), Hell on Wheels (2^nd Armored),  Seals, Rangers, Delta Force, or Green Berets… or the patches of those who fly – or flew – Mustangs, Fortresses, Voodoos, Phantoms, Tomcats, Hornets, Eagles, Warthogs, Blackhawks, Hueys, and Apaches; the legend continued.  Our fighting force was –and remains – the force… end of conversation.

But with the legend also came scuffs on the shine of that honor as our vaunted military prowess fell victim to the social issues of the times.  Minority soldiers were largely segregated (see Tuskegee Airmen)  and afforded not the respect and inclusion one would expect from a nation forged from the “All men are created equal” of Jefferson’s quill.  The women pilots (Wasps) of WW2 were relegated to fighter and bomber ferry missions while the men flew the combat sorties.  Racism and sexism remained in place even in view of the ultimate sacrifices blacks and women paid in defense of their country.  Change – as it always is – was painfully and abhorrently slow.  Votes, remember?

But in the end it was the scope of a man’s/woman’s  talent, mettle, and courage that would lay claim as to whether they were deemed worthy to wear the uniform of the US fighting elite.

Or was it?   It wasn’t… at all… not even close.

There was a new source of bigotry cookin’ in the kitchen’s of the White House, Pentagon, Congress, and on stoves all across the land of the free: The Gay soldier. Somehow, amazingly, the men in the halls determined ones sexual orientation equated military fitness (socially, ethically, morally) and could, if left unchecked, undermine the entire foundation of the armed services.  Huh?   And God forbid one happened to be a black Gay soldier… or Black Lesbian soldier… whoa, Nellie… sure as hell can’t have that, now can we?  After all, the public hysteria and fear had kept closets of Gay teachers, athletes, cops, coaches, parents and politicians under lock and key for like… forever, in fear of public crucifixion and personal ruin.  I mean, aren’t gay people perverts, disease ridden, and always always looking to infiltrate our sacrosanct family structure so as to get us all (the straight world) to “Change Teams?”  After all, that’s what the rumor mills crank out… gotta be true, right?   If everyone believes it then it must be true.

Well, the soldiers knew all to well the torches were lighted for them too should they dare come out and exercise their constitutional rights so they did what all persecuted folks do to keep breathing: they kept their damn mouths shut so the $^!% wouldn’t hit the fan

But the $^!t did hit the fan cause some brave gay soldiers and political supporters said no way…

The powers that be were now faced with a political hot potato and a simple question:  How to pander to a largely ignorant and intolerant “Family Value” voting populace while adhering to the Constitution (Remember that document?) and appearing to possess any semblance of an open mind?   “Don’t ask don’t tell” (see keep your damn mouth shut) was the palatable compromise fashioned by the White House, Joint Chiefs, and sheep of the Pentagon.  Kinda sounds like the advice given to Sarah Good and the rest of the Salem hunted to keep them from the Magistrates gavel and Puritans gallows.  Didn’t work, Btw.

And now the whole shebang is back as the House voted to repeal “DADT” aka The Gay Ban.  The tally?  234-yea… 194-nay. The Sectarians… er, ah… Republicans are just peachy with DADT.  All but 5 (including the brave Judy Biggert R-Ill) voted to maintain the ban, while the more progressive Democrats (excluding the 26 doctrinaires) wanna scrap it.  Coons, Carney and Spencer – in addition to Ted Kaufman (who we’re liking a lot these days) –  have stood firm with a LGBT community that is tired of orientation having any bearing on anything.   We agree and applaud them  for such a show of common sense, pragmatism, and fairness.   We’d love to say the same for King Castle who cast his regrettable party vote to extend the ban (but he’ll spin it to the middle soon).  We would love to hear Mama and Papa chime in on this but I’m guessin’ Mama would be a hesitant yea and Papa a definite nay.

But even with the yea vote to end the blatant – and thinly veiled discrimination – this amendment has to pass the muster of the same cast of characters that have helped carry on the hysteria up to this point: The President, Joint Chiefs, and Defense Secretary Robert Gates.  They will  digest the slanted findings of a Pentagon study and walk to the podium.   Now how do you really think, given the nature of political pandering in the vaunted “Family Values” environment, the men in the suits and Unis are gonna come down on this?   And in an election year… hubba hubba.   If you’re guessin’ status quo then you are in the majority.  For DADT to be given a ticket to the scrap heap it will require real courage and big balls on the part of the aforementioned playas.   I’m not sure they’ve got ‘em, but will hold out a glimmer of hope they do…

It also in all fairness must be stated that The President has once again declared June LGBT month.  Yes, we applaud this show of support for fairness but it is after all a proclamation, and they are after all just words.  Getting past the hatred to do what is right will take action.

Now here’s something to consider Mr. President and Secretary Gates… and the Pentagon exploratory squad:   I would wager that there were more than a few gay patriots at the Boston Tea Party (ironic ain’t it) and Massacre, San Juan Hill, Gettysburg, Normandy, Pork Chop Hill, Saigon, and Fallujah.  Many have died defending the freedoms of some of the very citizens who still call them names.   I don’t know about y’all, but when a Gay soldier’s casket is flown to DAFB draped in the American Flag, I call that… debt paid.  Hey people; how many of your “normal” friends would truly take a fatal bullet for you and your family?  They did.  How bout we all grow up, take a look at our own “closets,” and finally… finally treat everyone like human beings

And Americans at that.

So the migration to the beaches begins.  Not quite the hot sunny days we were hoping would stretch from mid-week through the weekend – more like late September than late May – but nice enough to fire up the grill, imbibe with friends at the first Jam Session, or stroll in sweater style on the spankin’ new treated planks of the south boardwalk.  Also not so ungodly hot that being jailed in Rt.1 and 13 traffic doesn’t raise ones BP while shooting pissy glances at the boy/girlfriend who didn’t take off early enough to beat the masses.  By and large a fairly good start to the summer.

Actually, if a ‘nor’easter had decided to make a call and wipe out all the Coppertone dreams, it would still be a great weekend.  And why is that, you may ask?

‘Cause it’s Memorial Day.  And should anyone reading this not get it… you really should get it.  Maybe you rode – or are riding – past the expanse of the Veterans Cemetery off Rt. 71 and noticed the fields of Red White and Blue flapping in unison to the now cool breeze.  Or perhaps you visited a loved one – or two – interned there or some other revered spot .  Regardless, it is a scene like this that puts a ‘lil rainy day into perspective.  This weekend has so little to do with bicycles, beer, French fries, fine dining, or negotiating the curves between Ruddertown and the land of Sunday Bloody Sunday while totally smashed.   Nah, this weekend has everything to do with taking a moment to appreciate the sacrifice many brave souls made so y’all could decide for yourselves whether to cross over to Nalu (love that place) or continue up the west side to further experience the Miller High Life.

Yes, it seems like eons since Omaha Beach, Guadalcanal… (the death march), Pork Chop Hill, Khe Sanh, and the fall of Saigon; or even the opening night of Desert Storm.  The fierce street fighting in Kandahar at times touches the senses only as a CNN night light.  But these all have littered our consciousness in addition to our landscape with fields of white crosses that often lie in anonymity as we make our way quickly (we hope) in efforts not to miss the Toss of the Tacos.  Sad isn’t it?

How many of our brethren would love to have stuck around to witness such gaiety and popped a couple of cold ones with us all?  More than one could ever imagine.

This weekend – and Day – is entirely about our freedoms and those whom took it upon themselves to bestow on us all such a benevolent and admirable gift; and at such a dear price.

DE2010.com writes of the political realm and how it has become at times as oily as the tentacles of marshlands and waterways surrounding N’awlins; the protection of our Constitution, Bill of Rights, and preservation of our freedom.  So Mama, Papa, King, Chosen One, Quiet Man, and Spencer for Hire, take a breath if y’all would and get the dubious state of our State and National political specter out of your minds for a couple of days. Think more of why you’re really here and what ya really ought to be doin’.   If you think for a moment that the spirits of those lost are all smilin’ on the many liberties lost while folks were busy securing or keeping their jobs, then by all means fire up the Weber, throw on a Kansas City Cut and pop open a Fife Zin.  But make certain to serve up a side of conscience with them taters…K?

And for our readers?  We wish – along with the politicos – a safe, festive and introspective weekend.  Just remember who provided it for ya and what it takes to keep it.

Ciao

We’ve been writing a lot lately about pretenders, contenders, Mama’s and Papa’s.  Oil and blood in the water.  Stained parchments and feigned rights.  Chosen Ones and Quiet men.  9-12 stopwatches, and brewing discontent.  About politicos who step to the plate and take chances – some with much to gain; some with much to lose.  We’ve chronicled the steps taken by ones with little to no chance (See Scott Spencer) but with a boatload of game, and some if they had more support and money (See K-Wade) could be party players.  We’ve written of hot button issues (not all, yet) that we believe to be of max importance to all Delawareans and Americans, and monitoring any responses that would lend us all a clue as to where our candidates truly stand when it hits the fan: Environment, Education, Social and Human Rights, Jobs , Economy, Poverty, Constitutional and Criminal Justice (and unpopular but needed reform).  Most tap dance when facing the band as the fence is a politically much safer place sit (a general rhetorical perch), but some actually tackle some toughies head on: Carney, Coons, Spenser on drilling; K-Wade on the Bill of Rights and Constitution; Mama, Papa, on fiscal sanity and the precariousness of debt.  All  wave the flag of the patriot.  And if one were to visit The Quiet man’s web site one would find a strong support for LGBT (no, it’s not a sandwich at Brew Ha Ha) rights (ballsy and applauded) which don’t always play well with the pedestrian uninformed, and bigoted (got lots of those).  And of course all had exercised their vocal chords (some screaming, some cheering, some straddling) when the Health Care Bill was signed.

But through all this, The King could always be seen hovering around or near the fray but never really drawing his sword from it’s sheath.  Oh, we encountered the mantras of the moderates (such is life for a Malcom) and the adherence to Party platform whenever possible, but there seems to still be the man who stands in line for the Green Room Sunday buffet finding all the offerings to his liking.  And the constituency has by and large found Mike to their liking… hence the sizable lead he has held over Coons since the second the Quiet Man announced.  So perhaps he feels not the need (much like Mama leading up to the Convention) to engage, we suppose.  And perhaps a case can also be made as to why he should (engage… I mean really engage) hop into the ring with his brass knuckles on.

Royalty certainly has its privilege.  Kinda like the veteran ball player who by reputation gets all the calls and special treatment.  Handled with gloves fashioned from Kid leather and benefit of the doubt, the critics would say.  They (vet players) are stealth-like.  In the King’s case, he is viewed as venerable, a tenured member of Delaware politics and revered by many spanning all political ideologies… pert near untouchable.   He has earned such respect to be sure, but when stepping up to fill the vacated Senate seat – and the bangarang that accompanies the hike – even the venerable ones are required to reintroduce themselves to a whole new demo; stamping themselves on a number of whole new issues, and facing the music; the melodies of ideology and record that the opposition ain’t about to let folks forget.

Contrary to popular belief, the King does have his share of critics and a smattering of fence sitters (see undecided’s) who have been chompin’ at the bit to see him emerge from the Bat Cave and go to town.

His fundraisers are nice.  They’re always nice.  The women all come out at the Queens beckon; the register rings and the till grows, but there is no fire.  Damn, I’d like to see that temper and passion we hear so much about and all would like to see once and awhile.

He may not need to, but then again…

I’m just sayin’.

Wait!… you didn’t know there was another songwriting duo that penned under a moniker so very similar to that of the fab four?  Well there is, and if you thought there was a rift between John and Paul (by way of Yoko) then wait till you hear the National Enquire caliber squabble Vladimir and Joseph (post mortem) are causing when simply paired to record this latest politically themed (Get out… really) album coming to you courtesy of SRR ( Spin Right Records).

“Karl Needs a Shave” is a contemporary and contemptuous Rock Opera that is an adaptation of a college (Amherst) newspaper article Candidate Chris Coons wrote some 30 years ago upon his return from Kenya that narrated his metamorphosis from a relative conservative thinker (see Roth and Reagan) to a more progressive intellect (Amazing what a dose of barrenness and destitution  will do to the right side of the brain).   In what we would imagine to be an epiphany in earnest for the young and impressionable Quiet Man has now become a symphony of fodder for the Republican maestro’s of twirl.   God forbid one ever evokes any socialist mantra lest they be perpetually linked heart, soul, and heraldry to that of Marx (Not Groucho).

Now granted, the Title of the article “Chris Coons: The Making of a Bearded Marxist,” certainly has the capacity to raise a few eyebrows – Birched and otherwise –  and should The King have autographed a college paper titled “Mike Castle: Anatomy of a Royal Fascist,” the left would be deep in celebratory gyrations to the resplendence thrown from the sparks of Roman Benito Candles.   So while this leak is not unexpected, it ought to be taken a bit in stride and context of the writer’s influence and mindset at the time.  I mean, wasn’t it Churchill who was quoted saying, “If you are not a liberal at twenty you have no heart, if you are not a conservative at forty you have no brain.”   When we are young, idealism runs on steroids.  Most of us have been there till the bills come due and we realize life ain’t always fair.  That is not to suggest, however, that we ought not continue to fight for fairness; it only means that unfairness will put up its own fight.

So the Quiet Man was not so quiet.  That’s a good thing.  Do we want folks representing us that sit in tacit acceptance and simply follow the crowd?  Labeling  people has no purpose other than to pigeonhole and stereotype.  It would appear to us that Coons has the capacity to see both sides of the fence in his elder years.  This in itself does not make him a great pol or necessarily the best man for the job. But he deserves the shot.   He is after all going toe to toe with a man of similar ilk… a moderate… and that’s driving the provincial crazy; hence, the Marxist nomenclature the opposition hope sticks.

We have no idea of any lasting influence, power, or affect  Coonsy’s Amherst writings have on him at this time.  But shouldn’t we hear him out?

In all probability it is much ado about nothing… but it do make for a hit political record.

How bout, “Come Together”  … Rather than, “Back in the USSR”

Given our recent reports (one picked up by Richard Black of the BBC… “Up in Flames”) on the developing environmental disaster off Nawlins’, some may look at this title as an extension of that coverage.   They would be mistaken.  This piece, while not focusing on the flood of crude with its sights set on Magazine St, does carry an ominous metaphor that is currently drifting towards the shores of the Republican State Convention in less than a fortnight.  The once pristine waters of a unified party are being threatened by a slick comprised of fractured relationships and dissent amongst its very core – and those who feel they should be the core.  Right leaner’s, moderates, Tea’s; all on their own soapbox with a biased and dogmatic view of just what the party must now stand for.  It could get ugly; and at a time when solidarity would appear to be a most valued commodity.

Now for anyone who’s ever been to a political convention, National or State, they would then be familiar with the ancillary revelry, debauchery and hi jinx that accompany the (serious) nature at hand.  It’s a time for struttin’ one’s – and the party’s – stuff while the family elders and network of envoys debate agenda, construct platforms, choose its emissaries (candidates) , and move towards the goal of whuppin’ the Dems in November.  It’s when a party ought to be at its zenith.  On top of its game.  But if the memo sent to the GOP party leadership yesterday by one of its delegates was any bellwether,  there’s gonna be trouble in River City, and it rhymes with T and that stands for TEA.

Ah, the memo.  With residue of Tetley all over it, the manifest was rife with the 9-12 fingerprints: Free market, fiscal responsibility, constitutionally limited Government,  and a constructing a platform the GOP and The Tea’s can agree on, and general intolerance for anyone with the temerity to hold one counter thought.   Actually it read more like a diaphanous threat; Like Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction when she chillingly tells Michael Douglas “That I won’t be ignored.” Yeah, it’s just like that.

Oh, but it gets better.  The said delegate, Evan Queitsch, goes on to Blast… and I mean BLAST… The King as a pert near conservative anti-Christ that stands in the way of true right wing constitutional ideology.  Now The King may be a ‘lil soft in the middle, but the Tea’s are steppin’ outta bonds with that one.  EQ proceeded to list vote after vote, Mike’s record as it applies to the “Global Warming hoax” (Castle siding with the environment), Omnibus Bill, the Wall St. bailout (the King voted in favour), Planned Parenthood; leveling him for voting against an amendment to withhold fed tax dollars from Planned Parenthood (oh, the horrors), and even attacking the King for voting for “Cash for Clunkers,” as they feel it would eliminate affordable wrecks better earmarked for the poor… for the poor now, huh?   This of course is a two way street these cars travel; one to supplying cars to those without; one to boosting the economy by Jump starting some sagging auto sales  Suffice to say, he (EQ) – and his followers – don’t care much for moderation in any form.  And directed at the venerable one!  Get out!  Coonsy’s gotta be turnin’ cartwheels.

And even though there exists some intelligent differences in the rant, his wheels fall off when he whole heartedly endorses Christine O’Donnell, referring to her as a Party Martyr (our words) that would be a player if only the King would debate her… which just ain’t gonna happen.  She is a non factor and a fraud candidate who due to her Tea leaf aura has been embraced as legitimate by those with the Grass Roots.  Maybe she ought to cut her teeth debating Rose.  Now that I would pay to see.

And the cherry on top of it all is the ringing endorsement of the now popular Papa U, who, if the chips fall just right could be the name at the top of the ticket.  But he cannot afford to piss off the very folks who are now pissed off at this shot over the bow.  This makes Mama Rollins a much more attractive candidate and unifier in the eyes of Prissy and Laird… and a bunch of other folks.   Yes, our political scene needs dissention to keep everyone honest, but a party also needs wins… not losses… and this fracture portents a big ‘ole “L” in November if the GOPer’s don’t straighten out their act.  Papa and his team better watch for the yellow light before it changes its mind.  Oh, and K-Wade (mentioned favourably to a T) ought to keep an eye on the yellow light as well… I’m just sayin’… somethin’ ‘bout the company you keep.

So there you have it Soap Fans.  Payton Place has returned for a new season with Chris Coons and John Carney calling Comcast for the full cable package.

Don’t worry if ya missed the original air date… they’ll replay the entire pilot on May 15^th.

No one needs to tell Chris Coons that his personal post position in regards to his Senate race with The King has him at a disadvantage coming out of the gate.  He as a candidate can’t get out of bed without stubbing his toe on the eight ball he’s behind.  Taking on Castle – the fairly (and we mean fairly) popular Castle – was gonna be an uphill battle; this is not news to anyone; especially The Quiet Man.

Trouble is, that after all Coonsy’s ballyhoo during and following his rock and roll three county campaign kick-off tour, he was hoping his campaign was gonna get a jump start, not a quiet down period.  His crusade needs for the voters (especially the undecided’s) to view him as a playa who is triggering State and national buzz as an upstart capable of taking The King to school;  and his Senate hopes with it.

The latest Rasmussen poll, while still waaaay too early, did throw TQM into a cold shower with a dose of numerical reality… ya know, the kind of Aqua Velvet cold slap in the face, reality that 53% to 32% polling numbers will get ya.   A large lead has been a given, but these numbers are similar to those back in February and it seems that The White House lunch with the Prez, some favourable pro Coons Washington buzz, and Chris’ own “Give ‘em hell” (you didn’t say it but you meant it) campaign speeches to date, don’t seem to have facilitated the needle to inch in his favour at all.

Now there’s gonna be lots of talk now (mostly from Mike) about making the Supreme Court campaign finance ruling “Downy soft” so as to keep a lid on Big biz and Big unions on their toes.  This of course would help the King.  He thinks he can cruise without some of the big contributors but knows Coons stays behind the eight ball without all the help he can get from the well fortified Blue Collar crowd.  Publicly, Chris stands with Mike on this – which supplies some palpable ethics spin –  but he doesn’t (can’t) mean it.  Chris has got big numbers and a big public “pro King” consciousness to overcome.  He’s gonna need all the media-buying amplitude he can get his mitts on.

So for now Chris can look forward to Cinco de Mayo, take his staff out for a couple Dos Equis and drink to Nike and hope she buys the next round.

Oh, and don’t be looking for the Quiet Man to be treating Rasmussen to a beer anytime soon.

He’s on Coonsy’s $^!t list.

So there seems to be some banter recently about what a debate will look like once the King and the Quiet Man take the stage.  Not much of the convo centers on the issues (although there are enough of those) but rather the respective heights of the two combatants.  Barack O’Biden had the advantage over a much shorter John McCain and just looked better.  JFK was taller and looked a hellava lot better than Richard Nixon and blew a rumpled tricky away with ease .  And in the mack daddy of examples, Honest Abe Lincoln – all 6’4” of him – towering over his short (5’4”) and stocky opponent, Stephen A. Douglass, commanded the stage in all seven of the 1858 Illinois Senatorial debates as Douglass looked more suited to ride a thoroughbred than he did appear like one.

In many cases – political or not – the taller the person is the more presence he has. (We’d include the ladies, but until Ann Donavan – all 6’8” of Gold medal Olympian – runs for a Senate post, there is no real precedent) A taller candidate seems to rule more of the air hence  being viewed as stronger and often times the winner.  Stereotyped?  Perhaps, but a style and perception issue nonetheless.

So what will the shorter and stockier Coons do to offset the Lincoln-like stature of the King?  A healthy tan?  Perhaps he will point out ahead of time that the King slouches… so how Senatorial is that?  Or maybe he wears a pair of George Costanza shoe lifts; or maybe a box… yeah, that’s it… a soapbox.  Looking all the like a Hyde Park, London Sunday orator…

All kidding aside, the Quiet Man will offset the King’s height advantage with impetuous verve and the King for his part will stand taller than usual as he extols the virtues of his lengthy service.

PS.  Mama and Papa will have a similar discussion when facing K-Wade as the GOP Congressional primary debates shift to a podium rather than those metal cafeteria chairs.  Rosie will have her work cut out as well.  She’ll need some really high heels.

It’ll all be fun.

And that’s the long and the short of it.

The distance between Rehoboth Beach and The New Castle IBEW Union Hall is roughly 86 miles.  On a good day it takes a ‘lil more than an hour 45 to cover the Rt.1/I-95 expanse … as the mud… er, ah… crow flys.  What?  Ya didn’t know mud could fly?  Well, it can; and with the velocity of a Roy Halladay fastball.

More on that later.

As most of you know, Chris “The Quiet Man” Coons made his  State wide “Taking off the Gloves” tour yesterday with rings set up in all three counties… ropes and all.  The only thing missing was a buxom hottie in each locale hoistin’ up the round 1, 2 and 3 cards.  Under ridiculously sunny skies, and a really big flag backdrop, Coons carriage was anything but that of a quiet man.  Speaking to relatively diverse, but mostly white (the hair on the boardwalk not included) crowds, Coons spoke like a boxer that knew he was about to get hit; expecting the next punch.  While some of his speech was  defensive in posture, Coons’ was most certainly not.  Showcasing an incendiary bearing and solid oratorical game, Coonsy  packed some needed muscle, delivering a few blows of his own.  Attacking the King on being a party loyalist in moderate’s clothing, Coons sought to expose Castle as a tired Grand OLD Washington Brooks Brother whose time and act is as dated as a Members Only jacket with the King being the only member.   All the while calling for new blood (getting’ a ‘lil’ clichéd); and that new blood would look just like Chris Coons.  It played well and was delivered with panache, but then partisan rallies are not orchestrated to give the “other guy” any props.   He spoke like a man who knew what was coming next from the King’s pugilistic repertoire.  And the King didn’t disappoint…

Ah yes, the next punch.  Boy was it coming and it was coming fast.  As a matter of fact, it was being spring-spam-loaded by the King’s men before Coons could finish his latte and bagel or shoot out a single syllable.  The King’s men went John L. Sullivan on Coons’ ass opting for bare knuckles rather than the puffy Everlasts.  A mix of mud and blood, the first spam of the fight went right for what the King’s men hope will be a glass jaw.  Citing rhetoric from the GOP playbook, the email was all tax tax tax… spend spend spend… and Coons will take and break the backs (paraphrasing) of Delawareans with his “reckless” fiscal policies.

Now the Dems are calling this muddy; and in a way it is.  But what the hell did they expect?  If I were running against Coons I would keep that hammer down.  If running against the King I would paint him entirely as a career out of touch and wishy washy Closet conservative who plays masterfully both sides against the middle.  Neither one of these attacks totally fair, of course, but since when has the word fair ever been synonymous with politics.

One thing for sure.  Neither one of these guys is gonna go down easy.  And this is only round one and its gonna get fugly.

And after the 12 rounds are over?… they may need to place the Returns Day hatchet under lock and key.