What’s up with all these Scott’s Lawn Fetilizer parties?  Oh, sorry…  Grassroots.  That is the politically correct term, isn’t it?  Wouldn’t want to offend any group who’s ideals make up the fairways at Augusta National.  Trouble is, politically is never correct.  It is inherently incorrect.  Place Mother Theresa in the political realm and she would stump, tap, and spin her way to Calcutta and back; the masses of hungered being driven to the polls.

A tad too jaded?  A bit too cynical?  A smidgen too apathetic?  Well, hang around this arena long enough and the rhetoric grows like moss; blanketing  even a crumbling wall while masking that fact that it may be in various stages of decay…  That’s why these “Scott’s” movements, while at times steeped in the well intended, are but political tributaries that somehow always flow back into the Main Stream.

Grassroots has its lure in community activism.  A Hollywood stage where Soccer moms, Suburban Dads, Families with Values, and Parents without partners; all banding to “Change” the way the Same ‘Ole works.  To really feel like you can make a difference.  It’s a good feeling.  A good feeling to have people feeling good… about the process of Democracy.  On paper, anyway.  Until the Soccer moms with family values run into the Mayor Daly type machines that really run the show.

You know, guess who the boss is?  Pity.  This is the unfortunate bi-product of the system that’s been created and that the Scott’s Miracle Gro parties always fuse into one of the big 2.  It is what it is.

The latest of the drinks come lately is the Coffee Party (so very original).  This facebook driven Starbuck’s poli-app has made a youtube star of founder Annabel Park and is actually threatening to become a bigger blip than the Tetley’s own congregation and their Grand Tea Bag…Glenn Beck.  Only, to her credit, Annabel at least has cloaked her dreams and wishes in a mantra of simply working together.  A nice platform.  But Annabel doesn’t understand how it all actually works.  The other side cannot achieve political victory.  It’s bad for biz.  Does anyone truly believe that all Republicans are vehemently opposed to anything Obama proposes on the Healthcare debacle?  Of course not.  They just simply cannot allow for a Democratic President to win such a victory; hence giving the masses the impression the Democrats are all that.  Cant have it.  This why we have gridlock and why the Scott’s gangs take root.

With that all being said, I believe these “fringe” groups have a place, if for no other reason than to – in theory anyway – keep the big 2 straight and honest.  As if…

And I drink more coffee than tea anyway.

But I offer my own elementally constitutional fringe fantasy:  The Tangueray Party.  Our platform?  Our commonalities and rosy future  can all be found at the bottom of a glass.  A tonic; a cure for the political blues and whatever the hell else that ails us;  a manacle of drifting paradigms so malleable that they can mold into any shape, party, ideology and personal constitution.  And at the end of session, we all head to Hay Adams to recharge the party faithful.

That’s how I see it.  Any of you have ideas for a Grassroots party?  Bring ‘em on.  You’ve friends here.

Drink up.