Welcome to the Delaware beaches.  The nations vacation spot.  Fun in the sun.  Dolles and Grottos.   On lazy summer nights the sunburned mass of humanity cruises the boards in Coca Cola style lapping up their quickly melting mountain of Kohr’s frozen custard or with napkin in hand, inhaling entire “Nic-o-bolis”  with mouths opening just short of dislocation.  And on chance that the dolphins dance, there is a spectacle of fins and flapping kites much to the children’s delight.

Further up – or down – the coast the surf fisherman angle their Garcia’s and Penn’s in hope’s of landing a record “Blackfish”.   Whoa!  What, you may ask is a “Blackfish”?  You mean Bluefish, don’t ya?  Ain’t never heard of no Blackfish.

Well, the entire eastern seaboard may soon be one Capt. Hazelwood perfect storm away from painting the whole beach with one long black oily stroke.  Black Gulls and sandpiper’s and bathers no longer in need to oil up with Coppertone.  At least the colour is slimming… or is it sliming?

And what could cause such a Cimmerian scenario?  A hint: take a Black and Decker drill, put it on anabolic steroids and place it on a platform miles off the coast and away from the consciousness of the Suburban driving public.   Sarah Palin (remember her…lol) was crucified for uttering the words “Drill Baby Drill” during her ill fated campaign run.  We as a country were driving past our need for a pic line of foreign oil, weren’t we?  F$$$ the middle east crude pushers, we were goin green… weren’t we?    Hybrids, Solar roofs, Ethanol tax credits, Hydro and Wind.  Hell, we’re even recyclin’.

Seems we had another 180 in Washington as it applies to offshore drilling and now the left – at least on this issue – resembles more the right.  After battling tooth and nail Bush 43’s offshore petro agenda just two short years ago, The O’Biden’s have floated out their own derricks claiming they provide a more balanced ballast.  In Poli-speak; yes, we changed our minds, now support the drill; but it is better and safer and more “balanced” than W’s.  Uh huh.  Says you.  Come on guys, give us a Barack…er, I mean… break.

Against the irate and irascible opposition by those soon to be drilled coastal legislators, the White House is now proposing drilling for more than just oil.  They are drilling to see if they strike any strong and viable support for placing some really big albatrosses a mere 3 miles (is that nautical?… like it matters) off the coastlines of Florida, Georgia, SC, NC, VA, Maryland, Bethany, Jersey, Conn, RI, New Hampshire and Kennebunkport.   But hey, it’s something we need to do to help “reduce our dependence on foreign oil”.  Where have we heard that before?  Our own Sen. Ted Kaufman has broken with party oilers Biden and Carper to blast the proposal citing spill risks that affects could reek havoc to both the environment and tourism should the unexpected come calling.   He don’t believe these reserves are sufficient to stem any tide… just make the tide blacker.  He ain’t alone.  It also awoke a slumbering John Carney today and has him calling out the White House a lil… and we mean a lil.  He left some “we need to “reduce our dependence blah blah blah” wiggle room. But the O’Biden’s now got a civil skirmish brewin’ on Silver Lake.

God forbid we have those wind driven eyesores within a binoculars reach of Dewey.  But give me one of them Gulf of Mexico behemoths (that they evacuated during Katrina).  Now that is a postcard.  Especially if ya like your burger with some Thrasher’s and a lil pint of Havoline.

So we have another in the series of hot buttons rainin’ down on the mid-term boyz; favourites and pretenders alike.  This, like health care is a big one.  We’d like to hear from those who’s political engines are revvin’ up on the tarmac waitin’ for their Delaware to DC commuter flight to depart.  We would love to hear from King Mike, Mama Rollins (when she graces us all with her already made up mind) and Chris Coons; in addition to Urquhart, Cullis, Wade, Izzo (she carries a craftsman w multiple bits), Wangen, and Campbell, give us all the pleasure of knowing precisely where they come down on the issue.  We’d ask Miss Tetley, but we know she’s plannin’ on homesteadin’ on one of them bad boys… at least till the FEC leaves town.   And we know where Scott Spencer stands: out on the boat harassing the platforms construction efforts, looking every bit like Ahab, replete with fuel injected harpoons.  No, we can tell you all where Scott stands and you won’t need an ear to the ground to hear him.   At least he will tell you exactly where he stands… an it ain’t gonna be on the drilling platform.

Speak up candidates.  This is, as Joe likes to say; A BIG F’N DEAL.  The voters got their ears to the ground too.

Well, now.  Seems like the VP was witnessed out shoe shopping yesterday in a secure Alexandria Johnston and Murphy store.  The interesting thing is that he was looking for only a single shoe.  Odd you say?  For most maybe, but the salesman was reported to have acted as if he’d honoured this request for the affable politico a few times in the past (as a Delaware Senator and now as VP).  And why a single shoe, you might ask?  Fair question.  It was because the matching black winged tip suffered irreparable damage when the Walter Reed surgeons were forced to extract it from his mouth (sans anesthetic) after his introduction of his boss at the historic Health Care Reform bill signing yesterday.  The “Big F#@&*$! Deal” he uttered into the Presidents ear produced a Daisy Cutter that would virally make the global rounds in but 10 minutes and send the entire bible belt searching for a bar of Ivory.  It has now been tracked and monitored to the edges of the Milky Way.  It was that big of a story.

Trouble is, is it that big of a deal?  Seriously.  Yeah, I know we must watch what we say (little pitcher’s, big ears, and all) and it looks so undignified to have a head of state (or semi-head) drop the Big One… and right at the F’n podium… at the F’n bill signing… to the F’n President!  But the fact was, it is precisely what every Dem in the room was thinking.  I was told by someone in the room they saw a prominent woman mime something to the effect “F’n right we got ‘er done!)

It’s what normal Americans say when they get hyped up.  Truth be told (now be honest folks) it’s what we all (most) say from time to time… just never to the President at an historic signing… WTF!

Very few I’ve talked with or interviewed by phone had bad words to say.  Of course, the family values Richter Scale measured a 9.2 (would level most heathen cities) and sent Glens U and Beck looking for their Pepto.  But most I talked to thought little of it.  I know, soooo many were horrified… oh my.  But some (yes from both affiliations) thought it was funny; one said cool.  One lady who hates anything Biden called him “refreshing”.  This is Joe… plain and simple.  He don’t have a governor on his oral engine and that makes him normal… at least in our eyes.

So crack open a Bud, bring up youtube, and take a gander of what normal is to a lot of folks.

Now the Dems can only pray that the whole Health Care Bill doesn’t get F’d up.

Apples with apples.  We’ve all heard the term.  Comparing like with like, if you will.  When talking political party analytics as applied to what differences – or similarities – may exist  in the respective ideologies, design, manner, protocol, and rhetoric, the side by side comparisons can appear to speak everything from marginal and ambiguous to flagrant and absolute.  It’s both what drives the voters nutz, yet to the polls at the very same time.  The sleek and soapy words “compromise” and “Partisan… or non-partisan” along with a  perpetual barrage of double talk wear out the carpet in every voter’s brain.  And should one have the temerity to attempt pinning any politico to a simple yes…or no answer, they are met with a well rehearsed tap and a shell game of verbiage that would have the AFLAC Duck shaking the bill off its head.  They want to be popular.  And will do anything to achieve that distinction.

So we will begin a series to best explain (in our whacky way) and provide the real differences between Delaware’s Hatfields and McCoys… er, ah… Democrats and Republicans.  We think of it as a public service… DE2010 style.  We will not only look at the differences in the two but analyze the poli-speak (see doubletalk) and do our best to translate.  Ya know “what they said and the genuine translation…”  They hate that.  They truly do; and it makes us drool.

So tonight we begin by examining why the Dems have absolutely no primary engagement on or anywhere near the books.  It is strictly verboten. Really?… you may ask.  Yes, really.  While the Repubs have laid their table with “Old Country Buffet” style; allowing any Tom Dick and Rose to get in line for a match with Carney, you’ll not catch so much as a whiff of primary competition for John, unless of course Spencer starts doing some serious fundraising or hits the lottery.  And you won’t see it for Coons either.

Why?  A few reasons actually.  First is that the Dems all know the score.  It is Biden’s party and he calls the shots.  You won’t see the grassroots Tea’s and 9-12’s mussin’ up his fine hair and takin’ money and the spotlight from the chosen one’s.  That oddly includes Coons who by default became one.

Secondly, anyone with the balls – or stupidity – to take such a triple dog dare would find themselves in the trash compactor more commonly referred to as the “Obama Machine”.   It wouldn’t be pretty.  Suicide rarely is.

And third on the hit parade are the Media giants (yes, the tongue’s cheeky) hiding just inside the neatly tailored party pockets.  You really believe WDEL and News Journal (fine bastion of journalistic principle it is) would ever buck Biden?  A political outlaw would be reduced to laughing stock status… and stat.

Now that’s not to suggest there aren’t a few whose screws need tightening itchin’ to stand on their Borax box and give ‘er the ‘ole college try; if for no other reason that they by law… can.   We hear the rustling of leaves, snapping of twigs and wagging of tongues.  There’s some figures who is talkin’, folks.  Now if they got the stones, the cash, and the capacity to leave their senses at the door… remains to be seen.

Final Note:  The Dems will rest easy during primary season.  Carney will stay sharp and Coons will gain ground.  That’s the way Uncle Joe and the Big O want it…and that’s the way it’s gonna be.  Capiche?

Vancouver, BC – Valentine’s Day

If you were to ask former Gold medal winning Bobsledder (Salt Lake 2002) Vonetta Flowers before tonight what sport was the winter games most dangerous, she would probably have said the Downhill, Ski Jumping, or her own discipline; The Bobsled.   But after tonight her answer may very well be “Travelin’ with the VP of the US”

Huh, you may ask?  What the hell is she talkin’ bout?

Sometime early Valentine’s night the Vice Presidential motorcade carrying Joe, the good doctor, and two former Winter Olympic Gold medalists – the other being 1968 Figure Skating Star, Peggy Fleming – was involved in an accident in Vancouver as Joe’s parade of armored plated star cruisers was en route to the venue holding the pairs figure skating short program tonight.  The details at this time are fuzzy but somehow a vehicle slipped through 40,000 secret service and Vancouver PD escorts and collided with the tank…er, ah, car that was toting the Skater and Bobsledder (who were riding separate from the Biden’s).  The two athletes were treated for minor injuries and released.  The investigation is ongoing, with one of the causes possibly being an oil spill.  An oil spill.   Hmmmm

Now that explanation could very well prove to be accurate as to how the vehicle scooched into the intersection, but  doesn’t answer the more intriguing question:  How the car got within 5 miles of that intersection to begin with?   I’m relatively certain there are more than a few readers that have seen directly or at the very least been inconvenienced by the labyrinth of security and detours seemingly put into place weeks ahead of when the prez or VP stroll through town.  I mean, does anyone remember the War of the Worlds impenetrable bubble shield  that protected the Aliens from our military’s nuclear strikes – rendering them as useless as a roll of caps?  Well, a High octane motorcade is protected by something much more dense and much more impermeable.  So we will imagine that at the very least there  is some egg on the emotionless faces of those adorned with earpieces and badass sunglasses.

Thankfully, Joe and Dr. Jill’s Kia Sport was not involved in the bender and all was okie dokie after…at least for them.  The Biden’s did make it to the  venue while Fleming and Flowers left the hospital and headed to the nearest bar…on foot.

And the unfortunate motorist?  The visibly spooked Canadian was last seen reaching for a roll of Charmin and is now rumored to be en route to Gitmo

In the highly acclaimed (Oscar for Best Picture) 2002 film, Gangs of New York, Martin Scorsese, painted a lurid picture of the struggle for respect and attachment amongst Irish immigrants in 19^th century NYC.  Leonardo DiCaprio’s  character “Amsterdam Vallon” was binded by pride to resurrect the Dead Rabbits gang as the Irish were faced with suppression simply for the fact that they had not been born in America, therefore, not to be viewed as true Americans.  Daniel Day Lewis’ “Bill Cutting” and his throng of “Natives” felt they were the true Americans for they had been born on American soil… hence their inherent right to lay claim as her legitimate sons and daughters.

Cut to current day and we find that Native mantra alive and well in small towns and a number of states as the indigenous folks look with a cautious eye at those who had the misfortune of  arriving late;  the natives having gotten much of the attention and political latitude that comes with being “family”.

How does this social/political  character apply to The First State, you might be asking?  And a rhetorical question it would be as y’all know the answer already.

As mentioned in a few of our posts, the road to higher office in Delaware often has as much to do with where you grew up, who your family is, and where you went to grade school and/or high school as it does the a solid political resume.   The roots run deep here and as stated previously on this site; folks have long memories that travel right along with their rabid support and faithful devotion.  A case in point is the number of messages recounting John Carney’s days attending and playing football for Holy Rosary (CYO) and his gridiron exploits as a St. Mark’s QB – DARTMOUTH, WE DON’T NEED NO STINKING DARTMOUTH… cause the last time we checked, Hanover was in New Hampshire, not Delaware – you get the picture.

This to take nothing away from the accolades and his sports accomplishments.  All earned we’re certain, and he milks it for all its worth – check out the 2nd sentence in his campaign bio.  He was a really good player..  Actually, if it was to be based on such athletic acuity, most of the family could’ve made a run for office… lol.

We just find it interesting that the nostalgia seems to get more front burner attention than his actual performance in elected office.  Now argue if you like as to his validness (his supporters), or his political shortcomings (his detractors), but make no mistake that what is behind the popularity and has been a catalyst in getting him elected– or at least assisted – to public office has been the Delaware roots factor (or DRF) aka… It!   John’s got an abundance of DRF and it is no minor deal.  We’ve seen many, as have you all, strap up the boots and make a run at those with a bounty of DRF only to succumb to a lack of such.  The said candidates could then be seen mumbling expletives under their breath as they walked from what was hoped to be a victory celebration, due to the fact that they ran primarily with the issues only to get skunked by the evil acronym.  The insidious and dreadful DRF.

Pete duPont had it pinned to a white collar, Joe Biden pinned it to a blue, Beau smacked Ferris with it (although Ferris had it too… just not as much of it… could’ve been an Archmere – Mt. Pleasant thang), Mike Castle has it, but understated, Ruth Ann had it (how else could you explain), Gerald Brady (who legend has it built the 40 acres and the Highlands with his bare hands and some election poster stakes) has a hidden basement cache of it… that he might have been willing to loan out to Tony Wedo… had he been a dem, and now John Carney is trottin’ his out for his run at the brass ring.  (It) is something that can’t be flippantly dismissed by an opposing campaign manager (not if he/she expects to win in this state) as it can be an efficacious peripheral used to influence public perception and opinion; ya know…”He’s just a good guy… He went to St. Ann’s… He eats breakfast at Angelo’s, and gets the special… He’s one of us… I know him, like him, and trust him.”

Where else can ones CYO enterprises produce such an eternal flame?  Why in the world does it matter?  Shouldn’t the criteria for such serious undertakings be a tad more extensive?  Our collective bar of expectations, higher?  Question: Can anyone, save a few,  who will be supporting John Carney or Mike Castle this election tell us what legislation they have penned their names to or only be able to recite what grade school and high school they attended?… time’s up.  We rest our case.

We would certainly hope the voters now pay closer attention.  But we also, however, understand and respect the – Lineage/Trust/Comfort/Security – voter matrix as it is as much Delaware as is Dolles on the Boardwalk or scrapple for breakfast.

It ought not be held against a candidate if he or she happens to have a healthy dose of DRF, just as it would be inane and disrespectful to suppose a candidate is somehow of lesser pedigree – ergo not fit or qualified to hold high Delaware public office (or any other office) – should he/she not be blessed with such social lineage or genes.

Funny, we welcome all who move to our state, taking pride as they too fall in love with it’s inherent uniqueness and quality of life.  We applaud their successes and befriend them and their families, but whoa to those beloved “transplants” should they have the gall to one day aspire to elected office… and against someone who has (It).

Now what manner of lesson would that be?

Whether you got it or ain’t got it, you deserve a shot.   That’s what we think.  How bout you?

Crystal balls and Ouija boards, tea leaves (cough) and Clairvoyants, soothsayers and psychics, oracles and tarot, mystical methods and personas all, that often get rebuffed by a cynical and diffident mainstream populace that prefers to look for life’s answers no further than down their very noses.  Trouble is that sometimes ya gotta step into a new age in order to achieve some degree of clarity, especially when any sane person attempts to forecast with any dimension of certainty who the hell is running for the Dems this fall.

To properly follow and comprehend the cosmic like confluence of events and mysterious vibes surrounding Delaware’s political scene one might be best be suited for a palm reading than offer their ear to any political pundit – who these days more resemble the crew of the Weather Channel.   The whys and ifs had their own show this week as we all sat back and watched the series of follies that beset the dems in general and the Delaware Dems in particular; from the Coakley/Brown affair that prompted an unsettling ripple effect  for the party, right up through the Beau watch and Beau exit, and now onto speculation into what the dems are going to do for a Senatorial candidate who will – hesitantly or bravely – now take the baton.

There also are some lingering questions (by us anyway) as to the dynamics surrounding The Chosen One’s not so shocking decision.  To wit: Was it simply a matter that the polling numbers were not adding up to a Moet moment for Beau?… i.e.  skip the embarrassing and crippling concession speech and live to fight another day?  How deep was the consensus that the Bradley fiasco would play like Willie Horton now and till November and on the front and center stage?  Could Monty Hall have slipped incognito into Wilmington to offer some attractive 2012 or 2014 scenarios (you figure it out… do the math and look at the terms and playas… lol) if he would play nice, fade out and take the hit?  Is this all a masterful ruse to orchestrate a later Beau run setting up …dare we say…a Biden/Biden hook heavy run for the roses in 2016?  Holy #$%& Batman, would politicians maneuver in such an artful fashion?

We will see so stay tuned.  Oh, and don’t get stuck at the corner of denial and vein… the spinners are workin’ on the lights… blinking yellow, bro.

C’mon Joe, do you really expect us to believe you are leaving such a critical decision (Beau’s race entry) in the hands of a News Journal scribe and second hand pressure from the commoners?  Really?  We’re looking for the turnip truck we just fell off of.

Looks to us that you have adeptly set the table for two different meals; now that is a politician!  On one hand we have the “I want Beau to run but don’t want to pressure him in a direct public way.”  This gives him the choice and a backdoor at the same time…perfect…well struck.

And on the other hand you’ve set an equally appealing table for the Beau man to excuse himself from by stating on the record “that Beau doesn’t want to run.” Are we expected to believe there wasn’t a lil Verizon pow wow where you intimated that you would glibly throw that out such information?  Shouldn’t Beau be the one to hold a press conference and tell us all that he doesn’t want the seat?

C’mon Joe, we may have been born at night…but not last night.

Now well into the throws of an angry winter

The masses hold vigil

Icy winds have carried chilly tidings from the north

Its arctic fingers delivering with attrition

A Cracking blow to the face of ambition

Ambiguous clouds threaten to blanket the son

Dimming his light

Will he yield to the quandary

Or take up the fight

The proletariat pillars stand tall

Unfazed by it all

Choosing rather to cajole

“Son”, they say…

“What’s with the suspense?”

“Ya wanna  git to Washington

Or fall asleep on that fence?”

There’s an old idiom that says “if ya wait for the right time, it never comes.”

For the golden one the stars could hardly have been in better alignment.  Daddy in the White house, Barack on the speed dial, looks, legacy, an appearance on Leno and a blind trust from the now fearful super soccer moms.  What could possibly derail the plans of grandeur and rite of passage?  Was this seen on the Mayan calendar as well?

When Mike Castle was ne’er to be seen near the front row and the cameras lens at Immaculate Heart of Mary; the race seemed on.  You couldn’t  throw a dart in Washington without hitting a pundit telling us that Beau was heading south…yes, but now how far south?  Ah, Perhaps Lady Coakley and her band of merry stooges can answer that question after abruptly ending any vestige of a party honeymoon and presidential coattail and sending the entire DNC to the Capitol Grill for double Grey Goose martinis with a side of xanax.  The shock waves have radiated well beyond Delaware and have spooked many a dem incumbent going into what was supposed to be a benign and joyus mid-term party.

Boy, has that changed

Beau is clearly on the fence.  The spinner says some solid stratagems for such a position exist…..blah blah blah

But the fact remains that while there has been tons of exploration, internal polling models, and general toe dipping…there’s been no announcement.

What say you, Beau?  You skeered a lil?  Gonna wait till it’s safer?  When Mike retires, maybe?

C’mon, bro…You in or you out?

The mid-term election – does any one pay attention; does anyone care… Really? Take away the press, the electricity, the recycled colloquialisms, and the je ne sais quoi of the suits gunnin’ for the White House and what have you got?… an off year masquerading as a main event.

Of course in a Mid-term there are races, candidates and issues of importance and consequence; as well as power shifts within the senatorial and congressional halls;  it’s just that they historically are hidden from view due to a press that can’t sell it and the by the apathy of the American idol… I mean, voter, who won’t buy it.  It just ain’t sexy.  No Pennsylvania Avenue…no thanks.  That is until now.

All bets are off in 2010 as evidenced in The Bay State (Massachusetts for those slogan challenged ) when the Kennedy legacy was smoked, and we mean SMOKED by the unthinkable and improbable Scott Brown with full support from the vacuous, inept and arrogant  Martha Croaker.  The result?… a political earthquake with a Richter needle pointed right at the dems, a presidential black (whoops) eye, and a collective WTF emanating from the White House as the Grand Old Party now grinds the shine off Obiden’s one year old presidential limo.  Damn, and it still has the new car smell…

And in the middle of all the shakes rattles and rolls, sits the small state of Delaware; 410 miles from being the smallest state in the union small; 3 whole electoral votes small…poised as it is to benefit once again (Our Vice President… remember?) from the hub bub due to one of the highest profile races (if a certain someone can extract his butt from the fence) in the country between a wildly popular republican librarian (he looks like one…so sue me) Mike Castle and the anointed one, Beau “Brummel” Biden. Both parties are drooling for a win here with national implications and a vault of hard cash about to rain down…from out of state, of course.

And it’s not just the battle for Daddy Biden’s seat that has got Delaware’s inquiring minds in fantasy overload;  the scrum to fill The Grocer Castle’s congressional post has Democratic Good Son, John Carney poised (as he was once before… (sorry John) to fill his destiny, unless once again derailed by fate and a lack of votes. Damn those votes. The mystery candidate who will oppose him has not yet been unveiled, but the little birdie informants are pecking at the window and we do have some ideas as to who the masked man might be.

These are going to be two hot and high profile races – Chris Matthews has the Castle/Biden? Race the second most important in the country – second?  What the hell is he looking at?  This is shaping up to be anything but a droll mid-term year.  So, you political junkies and degenerates, run down to Pep Boys and buy a seat belt… you’re gonna need it.

Stay tuned.